Zulu Dawn

I like to write, just the act of it can bring me mountains of pleasure. My blog reflects this.

My August is shot. I mention this so that those of you who care, who read my musings understand that billybear is going to ground.

I will attempt to keep some presence in this space, sorta like ace and I hope to come back in early to mid September though I doubt I can keep my fingers off the keyboard that long.

Every weekend is booked. Work is handing my ass to me. Now I've just received 'the call.'

'The call' hurts, what is dragging me down is that I'm in the age bracket where not so much my peers are being taken down except for the occasional lucky shot but my parent's group is just being decimated. It's fucking Zulu Dawn over there and all I can do is watch and wait, not my turn to join the front lines ... yet. My father comes from a farming family, a large family, a close family. My Aunt lays on her death bed, her large heart finally failing. I watch my parents closely now, pay more attention to our time together. Soon I will get the next call, pallbearer time again, the ten hour drive to place my aunt in the cold, cold ground next to my Uncle in a family graveyard on a once was farm. Fewer will attend then the last God damned wake.

I'm sorry. These ramblings are not for what MsTara accurately calls the Willow World. This forever happy place.

I just wanted to let you know that I'm not pulling a banky here, I don't plan on just evaporating, not yet anyway but in all honesty I am flaky and fucked up with grief. Like her husband she is and all too soon 'was' a great lady. We are close.

I'll drop comments when I can, attend TeaseTime when I can and not bring anyone down with my woes. But my blog, well it's taking a bullet right now. Time for bed.

Thought you should know ...