"It's true. I am so sick of dominating men and getting paid for it! I mean how much sperm can you spill in one lifetime? A LOT let me tell you!" said a slightly harried Princess Grace frantically dusting her living room before the rest of her guests arrived.
Grace, or Gwacie Wacie to her friends (of which she assured this reporter he was NOT) has spent the last few weeks redoing her image for "my man if I'm lucky enough to land the right one!" She now sports a much shorter hairdo and a total makeover. Fussily adjusting the big white bow on her apron and smoothing the pleats in her skirt she sets a stack of waffles in front of her first arrival, MsTara.
"Waffles are fine for an afternoon get together with the girls aren't they Tara? I'm sorta new to this," asks Princess Grace pensively.
Shoveling in the waffles MsTara replies around mouthfuls, "Waffles are good anytime Gwacie Wacie! These are delightful!"
Giggling Princess turns to the reporter, "There comes a time in a young lady's life where she needs to settle down and start a family. I want kids, a Man and most of all I want to be told what to do!" she suddenly pouts.
"I hear that sister," chimes in MsTara from the couch, "You have no idea how many times I wish some dork in the chatroom would just take me, just bend me over a bench, deliver a savage spanking and take me! I so want to be some Man's bitch!"
"Me too," whispers Princess Grace, "and I want to be made love to missionary style while making a baby. I've always wondered what missionary felt like."
Both girls dab tears from their eyes.
As the rest of her guests started to arrive Grace escorted this reporter to the door. Curtsying she says, "I hope there's a Man out there who will marry me, get me preggers and take care of me. I'll be a good wife, I'll keep a clean house, I promise! Surly there's someone for me, someone to tell me what to do. It's all I've ever really wanted, just someone to tell me what to do..."
In other news LDW announced a new site, "Fifties PhoneSex, you better believe you can shock us!"
The new Princess Grace!
Edward R Murrow would be proud!
ReplyDeleteEdward R Murrow
ReplyDeleteHeck, Princess should be proud! It took a lot of courage for her to 'come out' like that! Way to go Princess!!! My offer to impregnate you still stands! ::serious look::
Saturday 4/5/08
ReplyDeleteBilly Bear,
Whatever happen's in tonights KU vs UNC game, I'm glad its being played. Great schools, great traditions, great players, great fans!!
Kc
{{I hear that sister," chimes in MsTara from the couch, "You have no idea how many times I wish some dork in the chatroom would just take me, just bend me over a bench, deliver a savage spanking and take me! I so want to be some Man's bitch!"]]
ReplyDeleteHey!! This was totally taken out of context. AND I was under the influence of WAFFLES!! With butter and real maple syrup. Ms Grace is an amazing cook. A couple of her waffles under my belt and I'm not responsible for what I say. These rumors about me wanting some big studly Chris Meloni type Alpha Male to toss me over his shoulder, spank me silly and have his wild wicked way with me are just that, rumors.
So there!!
Wow... It takes a bear with pretty big, um, careberries... to attempt a prank like this... Hope you didn't get COMPLETELY shaved for this one!
ReplyDeleteI was under the influence of WAFFLES!!
ReplyDeleteGive me your WA chip! NOW!
Five years MsTara, poof, gone. Well we've all lapsed, free will, all that rot.
::Starts prying her blue Waffles Anonymous chip from MsTara's fist::
When you're ready you know where to find us. OMG! You're using Aunt Jemima as perfume now?!
::sigh::
to attempt a prank like this...
ReplyDeletePrank? PRANK!??
Every WORD of this post is TRUE! How else would you explain it ace? Huh? Mr. Tiger Smarty Pants?
::looks smug while ace writhes under BillyBear's crushing logic::
Every WORD of this post is TRUE! How else would you explain it ace? Huh? Mr. Tiger Smarty Pants?}]
ReplyDeleteYes because it's really hard to argue with a festively plump blue CareBear in comic book X ray specs.
And when did I start not even noticing phrases like that not leading to a reality check anymore?
;;sigh;; my world is getting weirder day by day. Good to see you, CookieMaven. I hope your rumored poverty was just another GOP lie. And that you haven't really been fused with Princess Grace this time and that you aren't sitting in a cage somewhere with Lucky and BillyBear planning all kinds of perverted violations on your helpless form.
Just hoping:)
it's really hard to argue with a festively plump blue CareBear in comic book X ray specs.
ReplyDeleteYou mean it's really hard to argue with a PSYCHOTIC festively plump blue CareBear in comic book X ray specs. Don't you?
And when did I start not even noticing phrases like that not leading to a reality check anymore?
It's because you're back on the waffles MsTara. You need help. I'm here for you.
::pats MsTara's breas... er arm, reassuringly::