Yesterday I was hanging out in the chatroom twiddling my thumbs just waiting for MsGrace's TeaseTime which was a good three or four hours off (I wanted a good seat).
If you missed last night's TeaseTime well you missed a doozy! I had to literally walk away from the computer twice (a first for billy) because Princess had gotten me so worked up and we have a scheduled date on Fridays (I just love Fridays! ::wanty needy grin::). My timing was off though. She'd get me all hot and bothered and I'd flick on the "brb" thingy and go get a drink of water (billy was all sweaty) and then I'd sit back down, grab the laptop and see something like this (Princess had us all restrained, immobile):
... my mouth just inches from your cock. I take my tongue and flick it across the head, just once ...
ARRRGGGGHHHH!
I'll leave the specifics to jemmie. She'll probably post something about TeaseTime today if she's hydrated enough brain cells after her recent Princess call. Check her blog.
So, where was I? Oh yeah, twiddling my thumbs (I've gotten pretty good at that) when jemmie pops into the WOT room. Within minutes it's just the two of us in the room, there seemed to be one of those lemming like migrations of everyone to Sissy School.
Billy: Wanna go over to Sissy School, cause some trouble?
Jem: no
Billy: uh ... ok
Jem: They'll be back. They won't be able to resist our teasing mocking ways
Billy: Well we are gentle
Jem: and understanding
I honestly don't remember exactly why I stabbed jem in the leg with a fork. I know I've been eyeing forks for quite awhile since MsTara instigated this no guns rule at her Tea Times (Friday 6PM EST) and probably figured I needed a little practice, making sure I don't hit the femoral artery. Also I'm certain jem deserved it. So it looked something like this on the chat client:
rebecca enters the room
Billy: Gently and with great understanding billy stabs jem in the thigh with a fork
rebbecca: omg!
Well right off the bat rebecca starts calling me 'Master Billy' and jem and I are off to the races. I'm explaining to rebecca that I am a legendary domme and jem's backing that up with my legendary pervert status. Rebbecca is paying close attention while I'm asking her if she's willing to bear the mark of the billy which is getting stabbed in the thigh with a fork. Rebbecca decides to bear the mark.
Billy: Gently and with great understanding billy stabs rebbecca in the thigh with a fork
rebbecca: ooooooow!
Jem and I have an IM window open on the side and we're both a little mystified on how exactly we ended up in this situation. So then I'm asking rebecca if she wants me to stab her with another fork because I just found a whole drawer full of them. While rebbecca is pondering this, jem chimes in with:
Jem: Master Billy do you think rebbecca is ready for The Spatula of Despair?
Billy: ::billy glares at rebbecca:: Are you worthy?
rebbecca: Yes Master Billy I think I am worthy.
Billy: Not whiny enough! Try again next week.
Well rebbecca gets miffed at this I guess and limps off to Sissy School and I gain and loose my first pet within minutes. Canadian guy then pops into the room and I'm asking him how he feels about getting stabbed in the leg with a fork. He and jem start inventing really funny names for common kitchen implements none of which I can remember because I was laughing so hard, so jem and cg if you can recall please put them in the comments section!
So if your 'thing' is getting stabbed with forks and spanked with spatulas, come see me. I stab you looooong time.
Five dollah ...
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Geez billy, I don't know why everybody except for cg left so soon after we got there. Prolly had important apointments. If cg wasn't as wierd as us, he prolly woulda left too.
ReplyDeleteSearched my electrolyte depleted brain for some of the other instruments of torture that came out of our toybox, and other than the Salad Fork of Doom and the Eggbeater of Justice, I came up empty. Maybe cg's brain has enough fluid left to remember more.
little bitchass
I wasn't there, unfortunately, but might I suggest the Swizzle Stick of Woe or Tongs of Torment or even the Butter Knife of Bane?
ReplyDelete-lbb
If you are short on Butter Knives of Bane, let me know. I have an extra or two laying around here.
ReplyDelete-lbb
I wasn't there, unfortunately, but might I suggest the Swizzle Stick of Woe or Tongs of Torment or even the Butter Knife of Bane?
ReplyDeleteYou can never have too many Butter Knives of Bane! I'll take as many as you can spare!
Unfortunately Swizzle Sticks of Woe can only be found in bars, not kitchens. Still they are intriguing ...
Lucky for me (notice a trend here)my bar is in my kitchen.
ReplyDeleteYou may borrow my Grater of Grief but I want it back!
-lbb
lbb it IS too bad you weren't there last night! I think you would have had a lot of fun. Maybe next time, and of course TeaseTime.
ReplyDeleteGrater of Grief
LMAO - I've always wanted one! Well Christmas is only a year away ...
My Peeler of Peril?
ReplyDeleteI'm apologize but I recently lost my Soup Spoon of Sorrow. I miss it so.
-lbb
Geeesh, you guys are WIERD!
ReplyDeletelittle bitchass
"Geeesh, you guys are WIERD!"
ReplyDeleteAre you the pot or the kettle?
-lbb
Are you the pot or the kettle?
ReplyDeleteUm, who has pot? Specifically. It's for my uh friend
I am NOT wierd! I am eccentric!
ReplyDeletelittle bitchass
Sooooooo, Billy is now a dom. A SPANKING stabbing dom at that. Oh, this is going to be fun...
ReplyDeleteMsTara writes: Sooooooo, Billy is now a dom. A SPANKING stabbing dom at that. Oh, this is going to be fun...
ReplyDeleteuh-oh
Miss Tara you know I would never ... uh ... yeah I did mention spanking didn't I?
::nervous giggle, wrings hands::
Well I can explain it of course, this rebecca called me 'Master' you see and uhhhh
billy grabs a Pepsi and a Swizzle Stick of Woe to drink it through while desperately trying to think his way out of this one and keep his fat mouth shut. Oh I hope she doesn't use the Soup Spoon of Sorrow ...
PS: Dropped by Tea Time on Friday but our delightful Hostess was no where to be found! I even brought a prezzie! A box full of Salad Forks of Shames um I mean delightful forks for the er crumpets(?). Well I'm certain I can find a use ... what I mean is I know they'll be used ...
::nervous giggle, wrings hands::
billy picks up his Pepsi and gently, with great understanding begins frantically sucking through The Swizzle Stick of Woe
"Um, who has pot? Specifically. It's for my uh friend"
ReplyDeleteI have no pot, billy, but should you find any, I have an old Bong of Bliss and a Pipe of Paradise around some where. I have not used them for years.
-lbb
"I am NOT wierd! I am eccentric!"
ReplyDeleteJemmie,
This statement means you are either in denial (of the mind this time) or you are rich.
-lbb
"billy picks up his Pepsi and gently, with great understanding begins frantically sucking through The Swizzle Stick of Woe"
ReplyDeleteOh no....billy...you didn't...
Are you ok?
I should have warned you.
You can stir with a Swizzle Stick of Woe but you should never, ever drink with one.
You should seek professional help immediately.
Had I known, I would have suggested a Straw of Succor.
-lbb
"You can stir with a Swizzle Stick of Woe but you should never, ever drink with one."
ReplyDeletelbb, my dumpling, come over here would ya?
Master Billy picks up the dreaded Skewers of Lamentation and the Meat Hammer of Misfortune
Are you, our newest addition, budding little flower, telling MASTER Billy how to use Swizzle Sticks of Woes?
"You should seek professional help immediately."
I get help every Friday lbb :-)
Lastly, I'd like to mention my Ladle of Lust. Its really good for serving up chicken soup.
ReplyDelete-lbb