Hello my dumpling,
So you want to practice The Way of the Billy when it comes to denial. Ha ha ha ha ha, are you sure you're man enough my little french fry? If so then you must complete these simple, ten steps:
Step One: Make sure you have no idea what denial really is. It can't be that bad really, you've gone for days without orgasming before. Ho hum. So you may feel a little more needy ... no big thang
Step Two: This is critical. Make sure that you don't consult with your Mistress before embarking on your little journey of self discovery. Why bother? You're doing it for Her anyway. She'll appreciate it. If you can, try and set it up so that your Mistress will be out of town during your trial, that's the best! You really won't need Her during this time anyway.
Step Three: The days you've gone without orgasming before making your decision don't count. The clock starts now, anything previous just doesn't matter! It will have no effect.
Step Four: Pick some random email, or comment from your Mistress as implicit permission that you're ready for the denial process. Keep "Step Two" in mind, she can't know of your little surprise until you're ready to tell Her. She'll be delighted with the news, particularly if you can time it so that she's just gotten back from a great vacation and has a million things to do!
Step Five: Make sure that you give the impression that you've actually discussed this denial thing with your Mistress so that your chat room buddies assume it and think you know what's going to happen. After all you just want to fit in and be part of the denial crowd.
Step Six: Make sure that you've painted yourself into a corner - that there's no way out without destroying everything you've built in the fantasy world. You can take it! After all it's a promise to yourself, if you've followed step 2 carefully then your Mistress knows nothing about it! Stake everything on success, lock yourself in good and tight! If there's a way out short of your Mistress then you are a pussy and not ready for the Way of the Billy!
Step Seven: As the days and then the hours and then the minutes start to crawl by ignore the fact that you're so mentally consumed with want and need and desperation that you could just die. It's just another slightly unexpected side effect. No biggie.
Step Eight: Realize that this denial thing has now crossed over from the fantasy world into the real world and consumes every minute of your life. You may begin to realize that you've made a mistake and quietly begin muttering to your chat room pals that you're in "real trouble." But not too loudly, not too explicitly! You don't want them to think you're a wimp do you? You don't want them to know that you don't have the slightest clue as to what you've gotten yourself into, right?
Step Nine: My personal favorite. Have a major fucking meltdown in the chat room! Make sure that there's a lot of folk there to witness it. This is the time to reveal all of your insecurities, all of your self-destructive tendencies. Share gosh darn it, let the emotion out! Alienate as many people as you can with your black mood. Laugh as you watch them flee the room. Give 'em a taste of your dark side. Panic your friends!
Step Ten: As klaxons are going off in your head, your fantasy world filling with smoke and you're hand is dangerously hovering over the 'self-destruct' button and you oh-so-badly want to press it (it's so pretty! go ahead push it you pansy!) hope and pray that your Mistress is as experienced as MsGrace. When that IM window pops open from Her asking "What the holy hell is going on?!" get on your knees and BEG for relief. If you're very, very lucky like I was you'll get it!
Now if you follow the Way of the Billy for denial my little mushroom then you're a bigger moron than I was because you've been warned. Trust me on this, denial is a bitch! Not to be undertaken lightly and not without a lot of consultation with your Mistress and Her permission.
I apologize to MsGrace, ace and jem in particular and the chat room in general. Things obviously got out of hand. Everyone run!!! Billy's gonna blow!
You may not know it or think Billy is a bit of a drama queen but this was a very near thing ... some of you may have mixed emotions about that - too bad! - LOL
Now I'm sort of interested in denial. I think it has interesting possibilities but I'm relatively sure that I'm not going to be a marathoner. The next time I decide that I wanna give it a go you can bet that MsGrace will be very much in the loop! I think I might enjoy it more if I don't practice the Way of the Billy!
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Well billy, I think you have performed a valuable community service here. You have undoubtedly saved many unsuspecting denial enthusiasts from a fate similar to yours. Actually, your list contains the exact information that was on those missing pages that we kept from you for your own good.
ReplyDeleteAnd you were lucky our Princess came back when she did so she could pull your ass out of the fire! lol
And don't worry yourself about driving people from the chatroom. I talked to a lot of the ones who left and they assured me that they were only leaving to get more popcorn.
little bitchass
Wow... Billy...
ReplyDeleteWhat a post. You really did paint yourself into a corner, moreso than I even realized! (Of course, since you were afraid to share too much, it's no surprise I didn't know.) Denial is such a powerful tool, the use of it must be handled judiciously. I think your post is helpful to many who are looking to start.
It's interesting that your way of thinking becomes more and more clear, and then, as panic sets in, your brain clouds over and you begin to hyperventilate, bargain, and deteriorate. Only proper guidance is going to help you out of that jam, as you've come to see.
None of us who are your friends want you to use denial to fit in with us. We all are looking for certain things out of this, and you and Grace must figure out what it is that Billy is looking for. I don't talk to you in chat because you are a denial slut, I talk to you because you're a blast to talk to. Never forget that.
I'm really excited to see where Billy goes from here... Thank heavens you have this blog... It's so comforting for the rest of us to read what you're going through. I just hope that whatever pain or stress you've come through to get to this place has taught you about yourself and how to be the Billy you aspire to be. That makes it so worth it.
See you around, pal! I got yer back, yo!
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