Billy's Annual Pet Self-Appraisal

Jem's been filling my ear that each year MsGrace sits each of her pets down for their annual review. We're suppose to rate ourselves before the review takes place using a sliding scale of (-2 to +2 where -2 is very bad and +2 is very good).

I haven't been here that long yet so it shouldn't be that bad. I'll use my little blog as a diary of what went wrong ... er on.

Found MsGrace +2

• Best thing that ever happened to billy

Left MsGrace to slut around -2

• Yeah, that was pretty stupid though it might have been best in the long term.

Got "petted" by MsGrace +2

• The scale should go up to a million gazillion for that one. I'll send an email to HR on that. Being Her pet is the absolute bestest thing that happened to little ol' billy. I should probably stop here but my blog goes on ...
  

Numerous BattleStar posts 0

• We both love BattleStar but this action carries no weight as far as being Her pet

Experimenting With Denial -7
Oh this one is gonna leave a mark. The form says I need to itemize ... let's see

• Doing it without Her prior knowledge -2
• Doing it when she's on vacation -1
• Springing a wanty needy basket case on her the second she gets back from a fantastic vacation, yeah that sort of backfired -2
• Coming close to self-destructing, well I think it's a negative -2

Learning never to mess with denial again +2

• Yeppers, The Way of the Billy is not for billy
  

Making new, close friends +3

• jem, lbb, ace well I hope you know what your friendship means to me, I'm a pretty subtle guy but I try to express myself. Have I made myself clear? This should be worth about a million points (another email goes out to HR on their worthless rating system)
  
• Finally getting to meet lbb in the chatroom!!! +1
  

Issuing a public challenge to MsGrace +2
Uh-oh. Well let's see how this one pans out ...

• Publicly challenging the best Cock Teasing Bitch on the planet might not have been my smartest move -2
• Loosing to the best Cock Teasing Bitch on the planet. Oh that was sweet, a seriously great call, no regrets from billy on that one +2
• Singing I'm a Little Teapot - oh I know She enjoyed that +2
• not bad +2 over all. Thought I might go in the red on this one.
  

TracerBulletBilly -8
Hmmm, probably not such a hot idea inventing that guy ... let's see

• Pissing off Giantess Gretchen, having broken ribs and a bad case of poison ivy -2
• Shooting MsTara, yeah not such a smart move, I regret that, heat of the moment there MsTara -2
• Shooting Baltar_takenbyPrincessGrace, I still feel pretty good about that one +1
• Having ace use my own gun against me, yeah putting ace in that situation wasn't too bright -1
• Getting sued by my GalPal Friday, kinda bitter about that one -2
• Not finding Princess's panties yet - well it's the holidays! No one is around. I know, I know, no feeble excuses -2
• Grand total is: -8 Ouch! billy glares angrily at himself in the mirror, mutters "bonehead"
  

Irritating Princess During the Holidays 0
Yeah, another smart billy move, well let's see ...

• Irritating Princess During the Holidays -2
• Clearing the air with Princess +2
• Total 0 - I think the clearing the air should count for more because that was a very good thing (another email goes to HR on their rating system)

Shooting Princess in the Knee -2

• Well she was in disguise in the chatroom! Yeah, I know, no feeble excuses
• billy decides not to send an email to HR on their rating system
  

Endlessly yakking about my never ending joy and wonder at being Her pet +2

• I will never shut up about this, MsGrace makes life so much fun on Her playground
• I sincerely adore Her
  
• (another email goes to HR on their rating system)

Becoming Closer and Closer Friends with MsGrace as time goes by +2

• I will never shut up about this to Her. Most of my gab to Her is "between friends" and like my fantasies with Her will remain just between us
  
• (another email goes to HR on their rating system) HR is probably beginning to feel a bit like MsGrace on a typical day with email from billy
  

OK, let's see how billy did this year and there's still a bit more to go but really what could I do in the remaining time? (well, I managed to shoot Princess and meet lbb in just one night, so I may have to keep updating this thing) ... carry the six ... divide by four ...

Grand Total is: -4

Bily savagely kicks "mittens" across the room and picks up another negative point for imaginary animal abuse.

Grand Total is: -5

Well, um drat MsGrace. I guess there's room for improvement here huh?

::nervous giggle::

I guess all I can say is that you haven't exactly been bored since you "petted" me ... right?

::nervous giggle, wringing hands::